Thursday, September 23, 2010

Growing up and Moving Forward

There is something that I realized quite some time ago. Things always change, and it doesn't matter what it is or who it is.

I remember one Christmas when all of us were still young and living at home, I came downstairs and sat on my parents bed. I had a heartache. At that moment I felt that I had so little control over what would happen. My heartache came because I couldn't stop change, I couldn't hold onto time no matter how firm my grasp or my desire was. The future was coming and I just had to turn towards it and plant my feet firmly so that it wouldn't over power me. I was growing up and eventually I would have to leave.

Living away I love returning. But, things have changed still. I notice that I am no longer a remaining cast member. I am invited to join in every other season or so. I now realize that I can't hold onto what once was or I will go crazy with sadness. I no longer know what is going on behind the doors of my home.