Thursday, October 7, 2010

The Feeling of there is Something Important to Say

It is true, I totally feel like there is something really important I should be telling people, and then I think through my life right now and realize that is impossible since my life is fairly monotonous.

I wake up every day around 8am if I like to or not, and then I take my normal half hour to get ready, pack my stuff, let the dog out, and feed the dog. Then it is on to the bus, where I sit for another half hour watching the same scenery go by. Last semester it was to the point where I had to spot the same object everyday or my day would just be off, oh and I had to sit in the same seat or I would just be grumpy and shoot daggers from my eyes at the person who dared to sit where I was supposed to.

Now thank heavens, I only ride the bus in the morning and I go home with Adam in the afternoon.

I get to school and do the same classes day after day after day. And I deal with students and professors that are having just about the same exciting day I am having. After brushing out ideas of stranglation I can move onto sitting in front of my computer checking emails. Woot!

When 2:30 rolls around I am ready to leave and grab some lunch. And then I go home and cook, clean, sleep, eat and think I have to do that all over again.

I wish there was one thing that would change.... I wish I could lose some weight. I mean what the ... I have been eating fine and exercising and now I just feel like I should forget about it. Eat up!

Thursday, September 23, 2010

Growing up and Moving Forward

There is something that I realized quite some time ago. Things always change, and it doesn't matter what it is or who it is.

I remember one Christmas when all of us were still young and living at home, I came downstairs and sat on my parents bed. I had a heartache. At that moment I felt that I had so little control over what would happen. My heartache came because I couldn't stop change, I couldn't hold onto time no matter how firm my grasp or my desire was. The future was coming and I just had to turn towards it and plant my feet firmly so that it wouldn't over power me. I was growing up and eventually I would have to leave.

Living away I love returning. But, things have changed still. I notice that I am no longer a remaining cast member. I am invited to join in every other season or so. I now realize that I can't hold onto what once was or I will go crazy with sadness. I no longer know what is going on behind the doors of my home.

Monday, August 2, 2010

Growing Up

Don't worry my sweet younger sister. Before you know, you will get older. You won't have to wait for them to come home to go somewhere or do something. You won't have to tell them where you are going and how long you will be out. One day you won't just be the younger sister, you will be older. Don't worry they will treat you as an adult. Before you know it, there will be a separation that you hadn't quite prepared for. You won't have to worry about telling your day to them and listen to their counsel. But I must tell you, you will miss it. You will miss being able to lie down on their bed in comfort and peaceful bliss. Not that being a grown-up is bad, it is just full of worries that I hadn't anticipated. And it is strange at these moments I wish I could sit on the bed and listen to their counsel and just their voices.

Don't be too excited to grow-up. Stay in that peaceful bliss as long as you can.

Wednesday, July 28, 2010

Oh to be Honest

Last Thursday Adam left his watch at the gym of our apartment complex. We didn't realize it was gone until 6:30pm the next day. Yes it was just a watch but it was a really nice one, and on top of that it was my first present to him (birthday) and on top of that it was a little expensive thing.

I have finally come to the conclusion that we will never see it again. Adam and I posted signs in the gym and one at every door in the complex just in case. To our dismay the signs in the gym were torn down and thrown in the trash not once but twice. And it was not the main office that did it because there was still tape on the windows.

After having a good cry and a chat with my mom I have finally been able to let it go. I just wish people were more honest. It makes me feel bad that someone knows we are looking for that watch but refuse to give it back. Why aren't people more honest?

Monday, May 17, 2010

To Summer,

Dear Summer,

I must admit I do enjoy the fun things I can do when you come around such as hiking, swimming, eating outside and such, but I must ask a favour. And I don't want to seem needy or put you out, but would it at all be possible if you could cool off just a tad. Maybe hide the sun for a while so that it doesn't get over about 75 and maybe a nice breeze. Yes, that would be so nice.

You really have been greatly anticipated over the past 9 months but at times I think you might be too confident and overbearing. Don't get the wrong idea though you are wonderful!

Yours truly,


Friday, April 9, 2010

Time for Your Cleaning

As I have gotten older, I have grown out of the idea that going to the dentist is an excellent day off from school. I used to look forward to choosing my little prize at the end of the visit, either a sticker, pencil or even a bouncing ball. What happened?

Now I seem to dread the days weeks in advance. It's not fun anymore sitting in a chair, crossing my ankles, and holding my hands very tightly together over my chest. While sitting there you are trying not to move at all, trying not cringe when you feel that metal spike scraping against your teeth. Not only that but it never fails that whoever it is that is cleaning your teeth will ask you a question that cannot just be answered with a quick nod or shake of the head. Instead you have to try to answer with their hands in your mouth or quickly when they are in between cleaning instruments. It is incredibly hard to sit there while they are scraping, brushing and flossing your teeth to make sure your tongue is not in the way. What I really struggle with is making sure that my mouth is opened as far as I can while they are poking at my gums and jabbing floss into my skull. It is my instinct to keep my jaw as close to my upper teeth as possible.

Luckily at the end of the cleaning they give you a little gift bag, Thank you so very much, which unfailingly contains a new toothbrush, toothpaste, and floss. What happened to the stickers and bouncing balls? At least my teeth are clean.

Wednesday, March 31, 2010

The Honey Glazed Ham

Get ready, get set... GO! Actually it was more like 'GO!' for my first day of working at Honey Baked Ham. Thank heavens I had some experience with the food industry and customer relations when I worked at Subway. Now there was an interesting... crazy... tiring ... FUN job.

So far this one is great. I had the good fortune of meeting a coworker named Megan who is helping to show me the ropes around the store and at the counter. (I finally know what the order number they give you when you order a ham over the phone means) Just wait Mom and Dad, I'll help you with your next purchase!

Adam also working for Honey Baked Ham but at another location. Hopefully when the Easter Season is over they will keep one of us on. It would be nice to earn a little extra money :)

Side note- That totally reminds me, I found out that I have 3 free plane tickets to travel wherever (well actually specified locations) I want. Get ready Willie, I will be there for your homecoming :)

Back on track- It feels so good to be exhausted. Not that I haven't been hitting that point multiple times this semester but this is just wonderful. I am looking forward to an excellent nites sleep!!!

Again that reminds me, I need to finish writing my prospectus for my graduate degree since they need a finished copy of it by Tuesday at 10..... Oh boy. But I actually have a research project again. Dr. Terry was scaring me by saying that he didn't think that my location, My Research Idea, would work out this summer. That would have set me back quite a bit I think.

The Lord has blessed me. I have a beautiful home that I love coming home to. I have a wonderful husband who loves me. I have an adorable dog who is helping me to get ready for kids (but that is still in the future). I am in a graduate program that is helping me to reach my goals in life, and it is helping me to feel fulfilled. I am blessed with a wonderful family that tells me they love me and tells me they miss me. I am blessed to be happy. I love life and it never ceases to amaze me what surprises and excitement is in store. It really seems like almost everything I have ever wanted to try or do has come about. I always wanted to live in Utah and guess what... I do. I wanted to be where I am in some form or another and I am. Life is wonderful.

However, it would be even better if my upstairs neighbors would turn down their subwoofer. I can totally feel it vibrating my apartment.

Anyway, there it is.

Monday, March 22, 2010

Right Now

Right now...
I would love to lie out on a beach and bathe in the warm sun.
Or maybe build a sand castle and decorate it with shells.

I would love to be at home feelingt the peace it brings.
Or maybe fly back to Georgia and feel the love from the home I grew up in.

I would love to be able to eat all the chocolate I want.
Or maybe I will just refrain and watch the pounds drop.

I would love to finish school.
Or maybe just enjoy it while I can and know that my life will be better because of it :)

I would love to be able to choose right now where we will end up in life.
Or maybe I will just wait and see where the Lord will take us.

I would love every day to be bright and sunshiny.
Or maybe I will enjoy the days that keep me inside by the fire.

So many wants, oh well. I love every moment of my life!

Monday, January 4, 2010

Should I do it? I have mixed feelings. Is it worth having my furniture possibly destroyed, my nose never being able to stop from running, my eyes red and itchy, my poor body convulsing from sneezing at least 5 times in a row bent over a sink with a wet tissue in hand? Is this worth it?

Am I ready?

I sure love them though.... well, it really is a love hate relationship. It depends on if we can get along. Can they handle an occasional torture?

What fun we could have.

On this note, my dear Penny, my dear friend. I will miss you. You and Leah were our friends to the very end.

Only Time

Only time will tell how life will roll. It will show me where I will go and what I will do. In a way I am really excited for the possibilities that I know just lie ahead. Not to say that I have not enjoyed most of what I have been a part of here, but I am too full of the desire for adventure to remain in one place. Just think of the world and all the beauty it has. How amazing its features are and how mountains can become hills but still hold as much if not more stories and history in them. I have seen cities and landscapes that can leave one speechless. So why not see more, why not explore more?

I guess that is exactly what I am doing right now. In May I head to the Yucatan, well the Puuc Hills, to study the ancient Maya. I am nervous but I am also so excited to be able to tell stories of my adventures when I come back. In about 2 years, my stay in Utah will probably come to an end for a while, and Adam and I will explore this country and dream of houses and yards and white columns.

What fun is to be had. At my journey's end I want to be able to explain that I have been an explorer, that I have found the beauties created, that I have found joy, and that I have filled my cup so that it is brimming over.